It's New Years Day and I'm savagely hungover. There's glass on the floor next to me, it's probably about 35 degrees in this room and it's 9am. My nose is stuffed up, possibly from the remnants of Queenstown cold, possibly because I fell off my chair drunk as shit last night at the pub and landed on my face. Ryan is spoon feeding me passion fruit from his mom's garden. I am in Australia.
I was very very very excited about coming here, and I must say, I completely underestimated how fucking awesome this place is. Perhaps the best way to break this down is by going through some of the perceptions I had about Australia before my visit.
1) Australian Beaches Are Beautiful - true.
In fact, I would call them fucking phenomenal. I got to a point in New Zealand where I became almost jaded with beautiful scenery, but I have now been rocket-launched into open-mouthed awe every time I go to a new beach here (which is about 3 times a day at the current rate). Ryan has shown me maybe mmmmm 15 beaches since I've been here, most of them are 30 minutes or less from his parents house.
2) Australian Seafood is Yummy - true.
First meal in Australia was at the Coogey Beach Hotel restaurant and I had oysters Kilpatrick (cooked with bacon on top) and pizza with prawns on it. FUCKING AMAZING NOM NOM NOM. Ryan's Dad is like way way into fishing and since I've been at the house here I've had snapper (a different kind of whitefish than the snapper at home), mussells, prawns and more prawns. A friend of the family caught something like 30 kilos of prawns in the saltwater lake right by the house here and Ryan and I spent a few hours yesterday drinking and shucking them, occaisionally feeding some to his kitty.
3) Australian Wine is Yummy - true.
In addition to being way way into fishing, Ryan's dad is also way way into wine. And he likes to drink it with me. A lot. :-) Interesting fact: wine in boxes here is actually really really good. And cheap.
4) Australian Water is Shit - false.
I was raised to believe that Canada had the best water for drinking and washing in the world - it`s Canada for fuck`s sake. Let me tell you - Australian water gives Canadian water a run for it`s money. Just a touch on the hard side, but very fresh and tasty and way less chlorinated, nice on the skin. Which is a good thing because every single place to swim here, including most swimming pools, are salt water. Which brings me to my next point....
5) Australian Sun Makes You Look like a Saddle Bag - true, but not entirely.
Yes the lack of ozone here makes the sun burn like a bastard. But I think the real damage is being done, at least to me, by the saltwater-sun combo. My hair is so so so so blonde it`s mental. And I`m brown like a coconut. I think I look rather Australian and I`ve only been here 4 days. However, I`ve noticed in every single bathroom I`ve been in, all the girls use shampoo and conditioner for extra dry hair. I see words on bottles like ``intense repair`` and ``for severe damage`` - my hair is so fucking crispy it`s gross. Sorry Chantelle. :-(
6) Australians are Boozehounds - correct!
In the book I`m reading, Fatal Shore (as recommended to me by Micheal at the bookstore, thanks!!!), the first night the colonists (convicts) landed in Australia is documented as being one of the most vile drunken orgies evar. This spirit is still very much alive in the Australian people from what I can tell. I am no stranger to getting on the piss, but something very strange happens to me here. Between the heat, the Bundaberg rum and Coopers beer with chunks of sediment in it, I find I am capable of getting very very drunk here, while at the same time I am completely incapable of controlling my hammeredness in any way. It`s rad. Me and Ryan are having fun. :-)
Side note, Ryan is probably the best tour guide ever. He takes me to yummy restaurants, stops for beers and photo ops constantly on our drives, takes me to the best historical spots ever (as he also is a fan of Captain Cook history) and is generally awesome all the time. He loves waltzing into a drive in bottle shop or a pub, barefoot and shirtless, and introducing me around to everyone. Also, his parents are so so so awesome, I adore them. They remind me a lot of things I like about my own parents (knitting, reading, wine, fishing, cooking, love of animals) and they give us tons of privacy to just do whatever we want.
It`s true - I love Australians, and I really really love Australia.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Top 5 Backpacker Items
Those of you reading this know me - I like high thread count sheets, I eat well and I like fancy bath products. The backpacker gods demand that you forsake these things in exchange for good times and blissful happiness. Turns out you CAN sleep on sheets that feel like burlap... though you don't feel like a sexy princess doing it.
As I approach my last days in New Zealand, and I'm sitting cooped up in the Fern Lodge hostel listening to the howling wind and rain outside, I thought it'd be nice for memories' sake to make a list of the top five items that made backpacking bearable for a first timer like me.
I present, my list of top 5 backpacker items:
1) My Hideous Orange Travel Towel
Kristy insisted that I get one of these. At first I was resistant, put off by the fact that it doesn't feel like a towel at all and I was still convinced at that point that I had tons of room to spare in my pack. aaahahaha :-P
Yes it's ugly, yes it feels like a shitty piece of polyester and nothing like a towel. But it's compact, it works, it never ever smells and most importantly, it dries SO FAST. Those three little words "quick dry towel" mean so much when you're arriving at a hostel at 5pm and getting back on the bus at 7am.
2) My HP Netbook
The computer room is a good place to hang out in hostels, but sometimes I just need to curl up in my top bunk and click away on my own for a bit. Kristy, beloved all-knowing Kristy, convinced me to get a netbook and I'm so glad!! Internet is usually $4 - $10 an hour in hostels, and the lineups for free internet at the library are looooong. So I'm just pleased as punch to roll into a library and plunk down and start facebooking away. :-)
Also, the netbook allows me the luxury of privacy for my Skype calls. I'm happy to scream my head off to Kristy and Jennifer about how drunk I was last night in front of a captive audience, but the mushy gushy chats with Aussie Ryan just wouldn't be the same with some hungover fuckhead lurking behind me in the computer lounge.
3) My Air Canada Outlet Adapter
Yes, electrical outlets sure are different in this part of the world! Kind of like an Asian version of our Canadian one - more of a [< o] than a [: o]
I was going to borrow one off Aussie Ryan and forgot, then Jack gave me this rad Air Canada set when we were in Taiwan. Everywhere I go I have the smallest, cutest, most patriotic adapter evar.
4) My Giselle Sandals, Later Replaced by Fancy Havianas
I was DEVASTATED when I lost my Giselle sandals after the poo party. Step Momma Jane gave them to me and they were so so cute. But a few short days later, at AJ Hackett's Bungy Jump gift shop, I found a cute pair of Havianas that look almost the same, and are actually more comfortable.
The black fancy flip flop is a MUST for backpacker chicks. These babies go from communal shower to swimming in a lake to the bus to walking around town to up and down decent hiking trails to the pub, sometimes all in the same day. :-)
5) LBS - Little Black Shorts
Oh little black shorts how I love thee!!
Wear with runners for a hike, wear with flip flops for long days on the bus or lounging around the hostel on movie night, wear with high heels and a cute shirt and be the hottest chick at the bar. You match with everything, you have pockets and you make my ass look fantastic. :-)
Honorable Mentions:
- earplugs
- Diva Cup *warning this is a girlie product, don't click if girl stuff makes you gag
- Malaysian multi-pocket toiletries bag
- water bottle
- cough syrop
As I approach my last days in New Zealand, and I'm sitting cooped up in the Fern Lodge hostel listening to the howling wind and rain outside, I thought it'd be nice for memories' sake to make a list of the top five items that made backpacking bearable for a first timer like me.
I present, my list of top 5 backpacker items:
1) My Hideous Orange Travel Towel
Kristy insisted that I get one of these. At first I was resistant, put off by the fact that it doesn't feel like a towel at all and I was still convinced at that point that I had tons of room to spare in my pack. aaahahaha :-P
Yes it's ugly, yes it feels like a shitty piece of polyester and nothing like a towel. But it's compact, it works, it never ever smells and most importantly, it dries SO FAST. Those three little words "quick dry towel" mean so much when you're arriving at a hostel at 5pm and getting back on the bus at 7am.
2) My HP Netbook
The computer room is a good place to hang out in hostels, but sometimes I just need to curl up in my top bunk and click away on my own for a bit. Kristy, beloved all-knowing Kristy, convinced me to get a netbook and I'm so glad!! Internet is usually $4 - $10 an hour in hostels, and the lineups for free internet at the library are looooong. So I'm just pleased as punch to roll into a library and plunk down and start facebooking away. :-)
Also, the netbook allows me the luxury of privacy for my Skype calls. I'm happy to scream my head off to Kristy and Jennifer about how drunk I was last night in front of a captive audience, but the mushy gushy chats with Aussie Ryan just wouldn't be the same with some hungover fuckhead lurking behind me in the computer lounge.
3) My Air Canada Outlet Adapter
Yes, electrical outlets sure are different in this part of the world! Kind of like an Asian version of our Canadian one - more of a [< o] than a [: o]
I was going to borrow one off Aussie Ryan and forgot, then Jack gave me this rad Air Canada set when we were in Taiwan. Everywhere I go I have the smallest, cutest, most patriotic adapter evar.
4) My Giselle Sandals, Later Replaced by Fancy Havianas
I was DEVASTATED when I lost my Giselle sandals after the poo party. Step Momma Jane gave them to me and they were so so cute. But a few short days later, at AJ Hackett's Bungy Jump gift shop, I found a cute pair of Havianas that look almost the same, and are actually more comfortable.
The black fancy flip flop is a MUST for backpacker chicks. These babies go from communal shower to swimming in a lake to the bus to walking around town to up and down decent hiking trails to the pub, sometimes all in the same day. :-)
5) LBS - Little Black Shorts
Oh little black shorts how I love thee!!
Wear with runners for a hike, wear with flip flops for long days on the bus or lounging around the hostel on movie night, wear with high heels and a cute shirt and be the hottest chick at the bar. You match with everything, you have pockets and you make my ass look fantastic. :-)
Honorable Mentions:
- earplugs
- Diva Cup *warning this is a girlie product, don't click if girl stuff makes you gag
- Malaysian multi-pocket toiletries bag
- water bottle
- cough syrop
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Joy to the World... but mostly to me :-D
I'm currently hip-deep in the Pray section of this Eat Pray Love journey, or Eat DRINK DRINK DRINK Pray Love in my case. While I'm much much better than I was a few days ago, I still have a bit of a rattly chest cough, a lovely souvenir from Queenstown - but really, it could have been so much worse.... :-|
When I arrived in Christchurch I thought I was going to die. Feverish, sweating, coughing, runny nose, probably going through some kind of liver failure due to being off the booze for three days. Whoever that lovely gentleman was who helped me haul my bag up to my room - thank you you wonderful stranger. Nicole, the wonderful Dutch veterinary student from my most recent bus, came into my room to check on me and convinced me to stay in Christchurch for a few days versus the original plan to dedicate a full week to Kaikoura. Word to Nicole big time.
First full day in Christchurch was dedicated entirely to napping, future travel planning, and then more sleeping. Second day I went to the Hanmer Hot Springs 1.5 hrs out of town. Though it was pissing rain it turned out to be a fantastic day, due in part to Courtney, a chick from Michigan who'd been living in Australia for the past year. We had the mini bus to ourselves and turned out to be fantastic travel partners, seamlessly switching the conversation and our ipods on and off throughout the day. Chatting with her made me realize two things:
1) I cannot wait to get to Australia (more on this in a sec)
2) There are tons of chicks like me in NZ, not to mention the world, who have told their old lives to get bent and are blissfully following their hearts around paradise. Fuck yeah.
I've often thought that in my past life I was one of those Japanese hot spring monkeys but going to Hanmer Springs actually convinced me of this. Twelve thermal pools, three of them unfiltered and over 40 degrees = total chill out time for Anna. I also booked a half hour in the steam room and brought in the Chinese white flower oil to clear up my sinuses. At the end of the day my muscles felt better than they had in weeks, my skin felt amazing and now I find that my Franz Joseph blister is almost gone as well as my Queenstown mechanical bull bruises. yessssss!!
My last day in Christchurch, yesterday, I dedicated entirely to the pursuit of joy and happiness. This includes yummy brunch with Nicole the Dutch girl, two walks around the botanical gardens, a trip to the art gallery with Courtney the Aussie/ American and a PJs movie night with the Scandahooligans. *sigh*
Woke up at 6am today feeling shit hot and ready to roll on to Kaikoura. Though my whale watching trip was canceled due to extreme wind, I still had a rad walk along the beach for THREE HOURS with an Estonian chick on my bus and ended up getting close enough to a seal that I was able to poke it with my finger.
Though I initially planned on spending several days here in Kaikoura, this place is a small town but also very inconveniently spread out (hence the three hour return trip to poke a seal). Change of plans, moving on to Nelson tomorrow and spending a full six days there. There's beaches, there's actual convenience stores, there's art galleries - a town with a pulse that one can walk around with some ease. Not a bad place to enjoy some good solitude time before DOM DOM DOM Christmas with Alieda and Medellee!! :-D
Now I've been holding off on this for awhile but I just gotta shout it out: I am so so so so stoked for Aussie Ryan, my sweetheart and partner in crime from my last days in Victoria, to meet me in Australia for New Years. oh fuck yes. ><
He's picking me up at the airport in Sydney and we're going to chill out on our own for a few, then head over to his parent's place in Wollongong, go party with his pals, borrow his Dad's truck and drive up the East Coast of Australia camping/ couch-surfing/ hotel as needed style. It's like my favorite book, A Town Like Alice, only it's not World War 2... and he didn't get crucified for stealing me chickens. :-P
I am so excited, so amazingly happy - in every sense totally and completely fucking high on life. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
When I arrived in Christchurch I thought I was going to die. Feverish, sweating, coughing, runny nose, probably going through some kind of liver failure due to being off the booze for three days. Whoever that lovely gentleman was who helped me haul my bag up to my room - thank you you wonderful stranger. Nicole, the wonderful Dutch veterinary student from my most recent bus, came into my room to check on me and convinced me to stay in Christchurch for a few days versus the original plan to dedicate a full week to Kaikoura. Word to Nicole big time.
First full day in Christchurch was dedicated entirely to napping, future travel planning, and then more sleeping. Second day I went to the Hanmer Hot Springs 1.5 hrs out of town. Though it was pissing rain it turned out to be a fantastic day, due in part to Courtney, a chick from Michigan who'd been living in Australia for the past year. We had the mini bus to ourselves and turned out to be fantastic travel partners, seamlessly switching the conversation and our ipods on and off throughout the day. Chatting with her made me realize two things:
1) I cannot wait to get to Australia (more on this in a sec)
2) There are tons of chicks like me in NZ, not to mention the world, who have told their old lives to get bent and are blissfully following their hearts around paradise. Fuck yeah.
I've often thought that in my past life I was one of those Japanese hot spring monkeys but going to Hanmer Springs actually convinced me of this. Twelve thermal pools, three of them unfiltered and over 40 degrees = total chill out time for Anna. I also booked a half hour in the steam room and brought in the Chinese white flower oil to clear up my sinuses. At the end of the day my muscles felt better than they had in weeks, my skin felt amazing and now I find that my Franz Joseph blister is almost gone as well as my Queenstown mechanical bull bruises. yessssss!!
My last day in Christchurch, yesterday, I dedicated entirely to the pursuit of joy and happiness. This includes yummy brunch with Nicole the Dutch girl, two walks around the botanical gardens, a trip to the art gallery with Courtney the Aussie/ American and a PJs movie night with the Scandahooligans. *sigh*
Woke up at 6am today feeling shit hot and ready to roll on to Kaikoura. Though my whale watching trip was canceled due to extreme wind, I still had a rad walk along the beach for THREE HOURS with an Estonian chick on my bus and ended up getting close enough to a seal that I was able to poke it with my finger.
Though I initially planned on spending several days here in Kaikoura, this place is a small town but also very inconveniently spread out (hence the three hour return trip to poke a seal). Change of plans, moving on to Nelson tomorrow and spending a full six days there. There's beaches, there's actual convenience stores, there's art galleries - a town with a pulse that one can walk around with some ease. Not a bad place to enjoy some good solitude time before DOM DOM DOM Christmas with Alieda and Medellee!! :-D
Now I've been holding off on this for awhile but I just gotta shout it out: I am so so so so stoked for Aussie Ryan, my sweetheart and partner in crime from my last days in Victoria, to meet me in Australia for New Years. oh fuck yes. ><
He's picking me up at the airport in Sydney and we're going to chill out on our own for a few, then head over to his parent's place in Wollongong, go party with his pals, borrow his Dad's truck and drive up the East Coast of Australia camping/ couch-surfing/ hotel as needed style. It's like my favorite book, A Town Like Alice, only it's not World War 2... and he didn't get crucified for stealing me chickens. :-P
I am so excited, so amazingly happy - in every sense totally and completely fucking high on life. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Queenstown Part Two: The Long Kiss Goodnight
Throughout my travels in New Zealand I've said things like "how much joy can the human heart handle?" and "This is so amazing, I'm going to party and live in New Zealand forever!!!" but like all things, what goes up must come down.
Leaving Queenstown this morning, I said what I imagine are my last goodbyes to Frosty, Matty and James (the English lads), Myrna and Luna (the Dutch Girlz), Camilla and Kirstine (the Great Danes/ Scandahooligans), the Scottish lads and all the folks from my South Island bus. Almost all of these characters will be in Sydney for New Years, and I'll be in the vicinity as well as I'll be there with Aussie Ryan in less than 2 weeks.***
This last Kiwi bus crew got pretty tight, and not just in the sense that everyone was hooking up with everyone, but there have been a lot of "no, I really really love you" kind of conversations going on in the last 48 hours. It's incredible how much bonding can take place in the space of a week, especially when you consider that you eat, sleep, party, chill, bungy etc. together for every waking moment. Like the longest first date evar. As I said to one of the 19 year old boys who was telling me about how much he loves one of the girls, the Kiwi bus gives you just enough time to fall in love with someone but not enough to learn to hate them.
Between the savage drinking that took place in Queenstown and a lovely deep chest cough I developed today, I think I'm ready for the Pray section in this Eat Pray Love Adventure. Although I planned to only stay in Christchurch for a day, I think I'll chill here a little longer with Nicole, a really rad Dutch girl from the bus. Museums and parks are good for the soul, and Christchurch has more doctors and clinics than Kaikoura in case this cold goes tubercular. Once I no longer sound like a barking seal I'll head North for my last destination on the Kiwi bus circuit and swim with some dolphins.
*** aaaaaw yeah!! ><
Leaving Queenstown this morning, I said what I imagine are my last goodbyes to Frosty, Matty and James (the English lads), Myrna and Luna (the Dutch Girlz), Camilla and Kirstine (the Great Danes/ Scandahooligans), the Scottish lads and all the folks from my South Island bus. Almost all of these characters will be in Sydney for New Years, and I'll be in the vicinity as well as I'll be there with Aussie Ryan in less than 2 weeks.***
This last Kiwi bus crew got pretty tight, and not just in the sense that everyone was hooking up with everyone, but there have been a lot of "no, I really really love you" kind of conversations going on in the last 48 hours. It's incredible how much bonding can take place in the space of a week, especially when you consider that you eat, sleep, party, chill, bungy etc. together for every waking moment. Like the longest first date evar. As I said to one of the 19 year old boys who was telling me about how much he loves one of the girls, the Kiwi bus gives you just enough time to fall in love with someone but not enough to learn to hate them.
Between the savage drinking that took place in Queenstown and a lovely deep chest cough I developed today, I think I'm ready for the Pray section in this Eat Pray Love Adventure. Although I planned to only stay in Christchurch for a day, I think I'll chill here a little longer with Nicole, a really rad Dutch girl from the bus. Museums and parks are good for the soul, and Christchurch has more doctors and clinics than Kaikoura in case this cold goes tubercular. Once I no longer sound like a barking seal I'll head North for my last destination on the Kiwi bus circuit and swim with some dolphins.
*** aaaaaw yeah!! ><
Monday, December 13, 2010
Queenstown Part One: Royally Fucked Up
I was warned about Queenstown.
From my very first nights in Auckland I heard loud boasts of legendary nights out and hushed whispering of horrific incidents taking place in this gem of a town. Imagine Whistler Village, mountains, river rock and all, with an enormous teal blue lake 5 minutes walk away from a smattering of gourmet burger joints, nightclubs and pubs. Now inject this picture-perfect place with thousands of backpackers coming in on buses every day and locals comprising of the most intense party animals I've ever met. Fresh meat meets seasoned carnivore.
Singing and shouting wearing party hats, our bus arrived at AJ Hackett's bungy jump on the morning of one of the boy's 19th birthday. We all pitched in $3 and bought Tom a jump and 40 of us cheered him on as he did a perfect swan dive into the canyon wearing his party hat. Lana, a late 20s girl from Nova Scotia was shitting herself with anxiety about the bungy and was running on a smattering of herbal relaxation pills and sprays. She also did a perfect swan dive and I swear I've never seen a bigger grin in my life.
High on adrenaline and positivity, we headed straight to town. On the bus the girls are all talking about who's hooking up with who, who hooked up with who at the Poo Party, who wants to hook up with who in Queenstown. Lana asks me in a whisper who I think would be the best lay on the bus. I tell her she should talk to Michael aka Michiel aka Miguel, the most awesome Dutch dude from Holland. 32, part Indonesian, a winning attitude, rad dancer and into nice shoes, good wine and Robert Jordan novels, Michael is the pick of the litter except all the other girls on the bus are 19 or stupid or me. Lana smiles and says, "yeah maybe, we'll see."
Upon check-in at the Nomads hostel, I discovered the Scottish boys, the English lads, the Great Danes and the Dutch Girlz thoroughly entrenched in several hard days on the piss. Hugs, travel stories, photo sharing, phone number swapping, facebook adding.
First night out we headed to Altitude bar for free drinks, then to the World bar for more free drinks. Even though my first night in Queenstown was only 3 sleeps ago, I have a hard time trying to recall the details of the evening right now. Probably because World bar is known for it's tea pots - cocktails served in a tea pot with little shot glasses perfect for sharing. Or drinking in one go with the spout in your mouth. My beverage of choice for the night was appropriately named Ship Wrecked. It seemed like a great idea at the time...
Score count for the evening: pretty much everyone on the bus hooked up with someone, including Lana and Michael, Birthday boy Tom and one of the 19 year old English girls, German Rikki aka Oma (Grandma) and a Kiwi dude and a five-way between some Niina from Finland, an Irish dude, a 19 year old English boy and some random local girls.
Next day Amy, an absolute boozehound from Canmore Alberta woke me up and said her, Michael, Mark the Canadian and some of the English girls were headed to the park for a picnic. I put my specs and jeans on, walked straight to the bottle shop for some champagne and enjoyed a toast to Queenstown while enjoying fruit salad made from local produce we got at a fruit stand the day before. Return to hostel to sleep, shower, eat a Devil Burger (mmmmmmmmmmm Devil Burger) and prepare for round two - the pub crawl.
I've been on pub crawls in Victoria before with University and a few organized by friends for birthdays etc. Nothing could prepare me for the night that laid ahead. We start again at Altitude bar, redeem free drinks, head to the World bar, redeem free drinks. Head to maybe... lets say five more bars, each time welcomed with a free shot and everyone buying everyone drinks. We literally crawled back to the World bar at the end of the night, more free drinks, back to the Hostel, "I Love you" "No I Love you" chats in the lounge until 7am.
Yesterday morning I woke up and thought my eyes were bleeding. I put on my glasses, took them off - it made no difference, my eyes were worse than two piss drops in the snow. I was a bag of broken glass smelly and sweating on the top bunk. This was a day some of you may have received Facebook messages from me saying I think I may die if I keep partying. My apologies for any alarm, I'm much better today, especially because I ate only fruit and water yesterday, curled up with the Great Danes and nursed my hangover like a newborn kitten.
In such an attempt to remedy myself, I purchased some "legal high" products from the bottle shop - Puff the Magic Dragon, completely legal imitation weed with the same effects as the real thing only it smells like soap. And it works. :-)
It was one of the Dutch girl's last nights in town, our official real goodbye, so the Great Danes bought some imitation Ecstacy tabs, also from the "legal high" section, and I was happy to dance around Buffalo Bar with them tripping on pills while we all drank copious amounts of water. PS - I like how water is free in New Zealand. I hate paying $2 for a bottle of water in Victoria, but here they are happy to give you a tall glass of ice water with lemon and a straw so people don't even think you're not drinking. Thank you Buffalo Bar staff for allowing me to be a baby while coming to grips with the terrors of Queenstown.
It's always a bit melancholy around the hostel when so many folks from the bus have left, this one was espeically sad as Michael left today. However, I hear he was scheduled to leave tomorrow but changed his plans so he could continue traveling with Lana. Aw. <3
Aussie Carley arrived today (wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!) and we immediately went for a walk around the lake to catch up on shenanigans from the past week or so since we'd last seen each other in Nelson. When we get back to the hostel I see Niina, scandalous bi-curious girl from Finland, limping over in tears wearing a sling. She'd rented a dirt bike for the day to rip around town, and though she's pro and had been riding back in the lapland for 15 years, she totally spilled her bike and broke her collar bone and possibly fractured her hip which now looks like a pile of strawberry jam with a bandage on it.
Put Niina to bed, went and bought her some dinner, water and supplies, set up her laptop so she could Facebook home and got her extra bedding from reception so she can be propped up while writhing in pain and chatting. She doesn't speak much English so at this moment I'm just chilling out by her bedside, occasionally chatting in broken sentences and generally keeping her company. It's a few people's last night in town tonight so I'll be heading out to the bar again soon, will be getting on the ice water like an animal tonight!!! Yeah!!!
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Fast Times on the South Island
It's been a whirlwind of extremely weird shit since I arrived in Nelson with the new Kiwi bus. Another excellent crew, and I'm especially pleased to find a Canadian dude (from Vancouver) and three Canadian chicks (from Victoria, Alberta and Nova Scotia). Team Canada represents at all pub functions in full force!!
Spent most of the day in Nelson at the pub watching cricket with Dr Dave, Aussie Carley and other characters from my travels in the North Island. I still don't understand cricket but I did enjoy the free beer tasting, a hike up to the center of New Zealand and a good visit with some familiar faces.
Left Nelson for Westport, a very small snoozy town. Not much to report there except for spending an evening watching The Life Aquatic on VHS with German and Irish folks who didn't get it. hm.
Earlier in the day the bus decided the upcoming Poo Party should be Christmas themed, and we all stopped in Greymouth to purchase costumes. Greymouth is the town where the mining accident just happened, and it was more than a little weird to be putting together funny Santa and Elf costumes while seeing "We Remember" and "You Are Missed" signs everywhere for the miners. On the other hand though, I suppose it was a good thing to pump some cash into that town.
The night at the Poo Pub, now that was some shit. The Poo Pub is a lovely establishment in the middle of fucking nowheresville, kind of like a sleepaway camp with a Big Bad Johns. The pub is owned by Les, and 85 year old dude who cooked us all steaks and got hella drunk with us at the bar. Slutty and scary Santas, elves, presents, angels, turtledoves, baby Jesus - you name it, it was there and it was very very festive. Many of us got too drunk to stand and ended up crawling down to the lake via a trail illuminated by glow worms. I lost my beloved Giselle sandals. :-(
The following morning all 40 of us disgustingly hungover beasts went to a local museum dedicated to the New Zealand innovation of deer hunting and farming. Videos of dudes jumping off helicopters onto the backs of deer, hog tying them and flying them to farms. So. Fucking. Weird. There was also a lovely walkthrough area at the museum showcasing various taxidermy masterpieces and live possum and eels. We enjoyed breakfast there where they served possum meat pies and a smattering of other roadkill delicacies. A quiet night followed upon our arrival at Franz Joseph.
Bright and early the next day I'm off to climb a glacier!! A very National Geographic feeling to don crampons and trek around a glacier like a mountain goat, drink from glacier streams. My experience, however, was kind of half-assed as I only booked a half day hike so I could spend the majority of my afternoon at the hot pools floating around like a manatee.
So here I am in Lake Wanaka which is eerily similar to Kelowna. Honestly, I look outside and feel like I'm looking in the Okanagan and should be at Jennifer's house making tempeh cakes. Looooooong ass day on the bus so I've just returned from a dip in the lake... and will now have a nap. :-D
Spent most of the day in Nelson at the pub watching cricket with Dr Dave, Aussie Carley and other characters from my travels in the North Island. I still don't understand cricket but I did enjoy the free beer tasting, a hike up to the center of New Zealand and a good visit with some familiar faces.
Left Nelson for Westport, a very small snoozy town. Not much to report there except for spending an evening watching The Life Aquatic on VHS with German and Irish folks who didn't get it. hm.
Earlier in the day the bus decided the upcoming Poo Party should be Christmas themed, and we all stopped in Greymouth to purchase costumes. Greymouth is the town where the mining accident just happened, and it was more than a little weird to be putting together funny Santa and Elf costumes while seeing "We Remember" and "You Are Missed" signs everywhere for the miners. On the other hand though, I suppose it was a good thing to pump some cash into that town.
The night at the Poo Pub, now that was some shit. The Poo Pub is a lovely establishment in the middle of fucking nowheresville, kind of like a sleepaway camp with a Big Bad Johns. The pub is owned by Les, and 85 year old dude who cooked us all steaks and got hella drunk with us at the bar. Slutty and scary Santas, elves, presents, angels, turtledoves, baby Jesus - you name it, it was there and it was very very festive. Many of us got too drunk to stand and ended up crawling down to the lake via a trail illuminated by glow worms. I lost my beloved Giselle sandals. :-(
The following morning all 40 of us disgustingly hungover beasts went to a local museum dedicated to the New Zealand innovation of deer hunting and farming. Videos of dudes jumping off helicopters onto the backs of deer, hog tying them and flying them to farms. So. Fucking. Weird. There was also a lovely walkthrough area at the museum showcasing various taxidermy masterpieces and live possum and eels. We enjoyed breakfast there where they served possum meat pies and a smattering of other roadkill delicacies. A quiet night followed upon our arrival at Franz Joseph.
Bright and early the next day I'm off to climb a glacier!! A very National Geographic feeling to don crampons and trek around a glacier like a mountain goat, drink from glacier streams. My experience, however, was kind of half-assed as I only booked a half day hike so I could spend the majority of my afternoon at the hot pools floating around like a manatee.
So here I am in Lake Wanaka which is eerily similar to Kelowna. Honestly, I look outside and feel like I'm looking in the Okanagan and should be at Jennifer's house making tempeh cakes. Looooooong ass day on the bus so I've just returned from a dip in the lake... and will now have a nap. :-D
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
What Really Happened on My Last Night with the North Island Kiwi Bus Crew
Similar to when I spent several big city nights in Auckland, Wellington has turned into a bit of a shitshow...
Immediately after check-in at the Wellington Base Hostel, the Great Danes, the Dutch Girlz and I decide to get all prettied up for a night out. As we walk into the Hostel Pub, we discover that it's called The Basement for a reason - picture the scummiest Port Alberni bar ever, only set in your creepy uncle's basement. We survey the scene for a familiar face and find the Kiwi bus driver Briggsy and some of his other bus driver mates - ah, there's the creepy uncle. Within minutes a pub crawl enters and the bar is filled with two dozen smurfs. You heard me, blue smurfs. I recognize several of these blue bastards from horrific nights out in Auckland and Paihia and get down to business shortly.
Fast forward to 1am - after many many "I can't believe it's your last night, Jagerbomb NOW!!" moments, I am officially refused service at the bar. Yesssss. The ladies decide to crawl back to our room in Sanctuary (girls only dorm) and bring the Scottish lads with us.
At this point I think it's important to illustrate how fucking old this hostel is. I'm no architect, but the historian in me places this dorm at around 1920: single pane windows, gorgeous stairway spiraling up all 8 floors, a high-ceiling reception area with original hardwood floors.Water pipes that hang from the ceiling and occasionally make noise like you're getting pissed on. And then there's the elevator, that old clunky elevator...
4 girls, two of them bootylicious Danes + 4 Scottish Rugby players = 8 people, the max capacity for the elevator. In hindsight perhaps cramming all of us in to get back to the room probably wasn't smart but as my favourite saying goes, it seemed like a great idea at the time. Sure enough the lift stops and we're trapped. And drunk.
I really felt for the people on the other end of the conversation when we pushed the emergency contact button - they ask if we're ok and receive a mixed response of Scottish brogue, Danish squealing peppered with cursing in a slurry Canadian accent. :-D After about 30 minutes the Scottish boys decide to take matters into their own hands and pry the doors open. Surprise - we're in between floors and can see a 3x3ft square of the 4th floor. Before I know it, the lads are squeezing out through the gap and pulling us girls through. I ignore the urban legends about people getting squished in half doing this kind of thing and allow myself to be shoved through.
Just as I was getting up from the floor, I look up to see the elevator repairman and he's PISSED. Liability, etc. etc. We look back into the elevator to see Dirty Dad, the most lecherous of the Scottish boys and Danish Camilla who has now burst into tears. Hey, if I was too drunk to stand and found myself trapped in an elevator alone with Dad I may have done the same.
Eventually Camilla and Dad are rescued and we call kind of stand there in a swaying group hug petting each other's heads and thanking the stars. Some of the group may have paired off and headed to handicapped washrooms at this point to express their gratitude in further depth. :-P
The next morning I say my goodbyes to the girls with hugs, some of us carefully avoiding the linoleum burn and bruises from the shenanigans of the night before. We make tentative plans to do New Years in Sydney... god help me. ><
Immediately after check-in at the Wellington Base Hostel, the Great Danes, the Dutch Girlz and I decide to get all prettied up for a night out. As we walk into the Hostel Pub, we discover that it's called The Basement for a reason - picture the scummiest Port Alberni bar ever, only set in your creepy uncle's basement. We survey the scene for a familiar face and find the Kiwi bus driver Briggsy and some of his other bus driver mates - ah, there's the creepy uncle. Within minutes a pub crawl enters and the bar is filled with two dozen smurfs. You heard me, blue smurfs. I recognize several of these blue bastards from horrific nights out in Auckland and Paihia and get down to business shortly.
Fast forward to 1am - after many many "I can't believe it's your last night, Jagerbomb NOW!!" moments, I am officially refused service at the bar. Yesssss. The ladies decide to crawl back to our room in Sanctuary (girls only dorm) and bring the Scottish lads with us.
At this point I think it's important to illustrate how fucking old this hostel is. I'm no architect, but the historian in me places this dorm at around 1920: single pane windows, gorgeous stairway spiraling up all 8 floors, a high-ceiling reception area with original hardwood floors.Water pipes that hang from the ceiling and occasionally make noise like you're getting pissed on. And then there's the elevator, that old clunky elevator...
4 girls, two of them bootylicious Danes + 4 Scottish Rugby players = 8 people, the max capacity for the elevator. In hindsight perhaps cramming all of us in to get back to the room probably wasn't smart but as my favourite saying goes, it seemed like a great idea at the time. Sure enough the lift stops and we're trapped. And drunk.
I really felt for the people on the other end of the conversation when we pushed the emergency contact button - they ask if we're ok and receive a mixed response of Scottish brogue, Danish squealing peppered with cursing in a slurry Canadian accent. :-D After about 30 minutes the Scottish boys decide to take matters into their own hands and pry the doors open. Surprise - we're in between floors and can see a 3x3ft square of the 4th floor. Before I know it, the lads are squeezing out through the gap and pulling us girls through. I ignore the urban legends about people getting squished in half doing this kind of thing and allow myself to be shoved through.
Just as I was getting up from the floor, I look up to see the elevator repairman and he's PISSED. Liability, etc. etc. We look back into the elevator to see Dirty Dad, the most lecherous of the Scottish boys and Danish Camilla who has now burst into tears. Hey, if I was too drunk to stand and found myself trapped in an elevator alone with Dad I may have done the same.
Eventually Camilla and Dad are rescued and we call kind of stand there in a swaying group hug petting each other's heads and thanking the stars. Some of the group may have paired off and headed to handicapped washrooms at this point to express their gratitude in further depth. :-P
The next morning I say my goodbyes to the girls with hugs, some of us carefully avoiding the linoleum burn and bruises from the shenanigans of the night before. We make tentative plans to do New Years in Sydney... god help me. ><
Monday, November 29, 2010
Farewell to my first Kiwi Bus Crew!!!
The past week has been such a total shit show, love love love the pals I met on the Kiwi Bus.
Cast of Characters
Kirstina and Camilla AKA the Great Danes
Two bootylicious Danish girls who love to dance to Britney Spears and get their drink on.
Luna and Miyrna AKA Dutch Girlz
Two artsy besties travelling together, often wear clothes that look like hideous jammies but are two smoking hotties. Also enjoy getting their drink on.
Sarnia AKA the MILF
Smoking hot late thirtysomething from Jersey who dumped her fiancee and decided to travel the world, just back from a stint in India. Enjoys smoking, reading and nature walks - we got along nicely.
Carley AKA The Aussie
Hillarious foul-mouthed chick from Perth, also dumped her fiancee and decided to travel around NZ.
Allan AKA the Creeper
Fortysomething dude who likes to take pictures while the girls swim and dance at the bar. Also likes to verbally confirm with everyone that they've paid for their room before getting back on the bus. o.O
Kevin AKA The Belgian
Kevin is Belgian. And hot. That is all. :-)
The Lads - nice boys from England
James AKA Little James
Shared a dorm with James in Paihia and have travelled the whole North Island with him, he's 19 and went to Banff once and considers himself an expert on Canada... and everything else haha.
Matty AKA Negrodomus
Dark brown tan, thickest Yorkshire accent in the world makes him eerily similar to Brad Pitt in "Snatch", afraid of heights so he decided to get blind drunk before going sky diving. Holds the record on the bus for Most Often Refused Service at the Bar.
Daniel Frost AKA Frosty
Hilarious stone mason built like a fridge who reconstructs cathedrals back in England. Best Friend of Matty, also hooked up with Luna. All around "Good C*nt"
The Scottish Boys - vile filthy buggers who whip their asses out at any given chance. They've also hooked up with pretty much all the girls on the bus. :-/
Dave G AKA Dad
The oldest of the flithy Scottish boys. Loud, used to lovingly call Aussie Carley Mum until she kicked him out of her bed when he tried to spoon her in Taupo.
Dave M AKA Tigerballs
Blond, tall, cute, quiet. Oh Tigerballs. :-)
James AKA Big James AKA Bubble Butt
Stockiest, loudest of the Scotts. Enjoys rugby and being mouthy at the bus driver.
Stewart AKA Wee Man AKA Ching Chang
A 5ft 5 Scottish version of the incredible hulk, the most atrocious Small Man syndrome I've ever seen. Enjoys throwing the pool cue when he scratches, which is like half the time. The boys call him Ching Chang because they think he looks Japanese.
Briggsy the bus driver AKA The Virgin
This was Briggsy's very first ever run with Kiwi Experience on his own. Likes to get hella drunk and shake his ass around while screaming any combination of "Off the Charts" "Sweet As Bro" "Kiwi Experience baby" "That's how we do it". Employed me as his "secretary" on the bus where I'd organize his paperwork and make phone calls in exchange for beers and hot dogs. Sweet As bro. :-P
Cast of Characters
Kirstina and Camilla AKA the Great Danes
Two bootylicious Danish girls who love to dance to Britney Spears and get their drink on.
Luna and Miyrna AKA Dutch Girlz
Two artsy besties travelling together, often wear clothes that look like hideous jammies but are two smoking hotties. Also enjoy getting their drink on.
Sarnia AKA the MILF
Smoking hot late thirtysomething from Jersey who dumped her fiancee and decided to travel the world, just back from a stint in India. Enjoys smoking, reading and nature walks - we got along nicely.
Carley AKA The Aussie
Hillarious foul-mouthed chick from Perth, also dumped her fiancee and decided to travel around NZ.
Allan AKA the Creeper
Fortysomething dude who likes to take pictures while the girls swim and dance at the bar. Also likes to verbally confirm with everyone that they've paid for their room before getting back on the bus. o.O
Kevin AKA The Belgian
Kevin is Belgian. And hot. That is all. :-)
The Lads - nice boys from England
James AKA Little James
Shared a dorm with James in Paihia and have travelled the whole North Island with him, he's 19 and went to Banff once and considers himself an expert on Canada... and everything else haha.
Matty AKA Negrodomus
Dark brown tan, thickest Yorkshire accent in the world makes him eerily similar to Brad Pitt in "Snatch", afraid of heights so he decided to get blind drunk before going sky diving. Holds the record on the bus for Most Often Refused Service at the Bar.
Daniel Frost AKA Frosty
Hilarious stone mason built like a fridge who reconstructs cathedrals back in England. Best Friend of Matty, also hooked up with Luna. All around "Good C*nt"
The Scottish Boys - vile filthy buggers who whip their asses out at any given chance. They've also hooked up with pretty much all the girls on the bus. :-/
Dave G AKA Dad
The oldest of the flithy Scottish boys. Loud, used to lovingly call Aussie Carley Mum until she kicked him out of her bed when he tried to spoon her in Taupo.
Dave M AKA Tigerballs
Blond, tall, cute, quiet. Oh Tigerballs. :-)
James AKA Big James AKA Bubble Butt
Stockiest, loudest of the Scotts. Enjoys rugby and being mouthy at the bus driver.
Stewart AKA Wee Man AKA Ching Chang
A 5ft 5 Scottish version of the incredible hulk, the most atrocious Small Man syndrome I've ever seen. Enjoys throwing the pool cue when he scratches, which is like half the time. The boys call him Ching Chang because they think he looks Japanese.
Briggsy the bus driver AKA The Virgin
This was Briggsy's very first ever run with Kiwi Experience on his own. Likes to get hella drunk and shake his ass around while screaming any combination of "Off the Charts" "Sweet As Bro" "Kiwi Experience baby" "That's how we do it". Employed me as his "secretary" on the bus where I'd organize his paperwork and make phone calls in exchange for beers and hot dogs. Sweet As bro. :-P
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Pommy-tastic Paihia
After spending several days relaxing and boozing in Paihia I'm on the road with the Kiwi bus headed for Rotorua. The bus crew is a smattering of German and Dutch girls traveling on their own and two herds of boys; one English and one Scottish. The boys are rowdy as shit, even by my standards, but everyone is good for a laugh and it's a good vibe on the bus.
Back in Paihia I fell in with another herd of English dudes and hung out with them and my room mate, an 18 year old spitting image of Tom Cruise in Risky Business. They were celebrating someone's birthday, Dirty Doctor Dave the Dentist, and we went down the road to a lovely pub called the Salty popular with local milfs and Mauri dudes. A total shit show of a night, flashes of high fiving dudes with three teeth and dancing on the tables. The English dudes and Tom Cruise wanted me to go on the Kiwi bus with them the next day but I could only imagine what a shit show it would be.
Sure enough later that day a fresh gang showed up in Paihia including James, a cheeky 19 year old from Essex, Shae a quiet chubby dude from Devon and Daniel and Matty, a couple boys from Yorkshire. We got on the piss pretty good, and I have since learned an incredible amount of Filthy Pommy words. It was live music night at the Beach house bar down the road from the Hostel so we headed down there. I called it an early night after the shenanigans from the night before but Daniel, Shae and Matty met up with some local guys and went back to their house to smoke.
Next thing I know, it's 6am and quiet Shae comes in zombie drunk as shit saying he'd been wandering around Paihia for 2 hours. The town is seriously 6 blocks long and all along a beach. o.O While making a good effort to be quiet despite his horrendous intoxication, he sits on his bottom bunk and glugs a litre of milk. Blech. An hour later his cell alarm goes off and he doesn't even wake up. James and I throw shoes and water bottles at his head but he's pretty much dead so James had to turn it off.
We run into Daniel and Matty later in the morning and apparently Shae got totally off his ass at the dudes house and passed out in a chair. They weren't able to wake him up and had to pick up the chair and toss him out of it to get him moving. On the walk home the three of them spotted some girls in a pool and Shae stripped down to skinny dip with them... and that's the last they saw of him for the night.
The bus from Paihia to Auckland was pretty chill, everyone was partied out and we slept mostly. Arrived back at the Base hostel and going stright to the pub I ran into Adie, my dear superwoman-wearing friend from last week. Had a pint with him and another English ginger dude by the name of Jed Bolt. That's right, Jed Bolt.
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Jed had been working on the south island at a ski lift for two years and it was his last night in NZ. He invited me out to dinner as he was keen to get down on some shellfish and we headed out to the fish market. It was seriously as if I had taken a taxi right back to Taiwan - freaky seafood in various tanks and bins: urchins, cod, clams, mussells, oysters, and crayfish, enormous fucking crayfish. These crayfish were priced at $58/ lb and the smallest one was 2lbs. So we sit down at a table and proceed to eat a crayfish sauteed with ginger and lime on noodles, oysters in the shell and clams in black bean sauce. All of this was paired with a fantastic Heather Hills Sav. Blanc we'd picked up earlier. Hands down - one of the top 10 meals I've had in my life. The next hour was filled with slurping from shells, cracking legs with our teeth and sipping. Unbelievable. Mr. Bolt was kind enough to foot the bill and we headed back to the hostel to go to the bar...
Partied with Adie and the English lads from the bus, got tons of drinks with the bartenders who lovingly call me "Anna from Canada" or "Canadianna" or "Canadanna", dance dance dance
Early early bus this morning, drove up to the top of Mount Eden in Auckland but couldn't see much of a view as it was pissing rain. Headed East and stopped at a town called Thames (named after the English river), kept driving to the hot water beach, which I was really looking forward to. How to rock the hot water beach:
1) Walk down the beach to where the signs are
2) Bury your feet in the sand until you feel heat
3) Dig a hole
4) Sit in the hole full of bejeesus hot water
I found a good setup with some local Kiwi dudes who had a tub right where the waves were coming in so it alternated hot and cold - fantastic. :-)
Went on a nature walk in the afternoon and checked out Cathedral Cove, a little beach tucked away with some cool rock formations.
Spending the night in Mercury Bay tonight at a small mom and pop backpacker hostel. Had a giant Spag Bol (Spaghetti Bolognese for us Canadians) and played pool and darts all night, how British haha. Ran into Jaekwan, a dude I met in Auckland, who told me he was on the tour earlier in the week and lost track of time while at Cathedral Cove and got left behind by the bus driver. Apparently he had to hitch hike into Mercury Bay and the dude in the car had a hand gun... :-S
Headed to Rotorua tomorrow for some hot springs. I booked an extra day there so I can have a spa day mwa ahaha Also very much looking forward to getting off the bus full of Scots and Brits and meeting a fresh batch of pals.
Back in Paihia I fell in with another herd of English dudes and hung out with them and my room mate, an 18 year old spitting image of Tom Cruise in Risky Business. They were celebrating someone's birthday, Dirty Doctor Dave the Dentist, and we went down the road to a lovely pub called the Salty popular with local milfs and Mauri dudes. A total shit show of a night, flashes of high fiving dudes with three teeth and dancing on the tables. The English dudes and Tom Cruise wanted me to go on the Kiwi bus with them the next day but I could only imagine what a shit show it would be.
Sure enough later that day a fresh gang showed up in Paihia including James, a cheeky 19 year old from Essex, Shae a quiet chubby dude from Devon and Daniel and Matty, a couple boys from Yorkshire. We got on the piss pretty good, and I have since learned an incredible amount of Filthy Pommy words. It was live music night at the Beach house bar down the road from the Hostel so we headed down there. I called it an early night after the shenanigans from the night before but Daniel, Shae and Matty met up with some local guys and went back to their house to smoke.
Next thing I know, it's 6am and quiet Shae comes in zombie drunk as shit saying he'd been wandering around Paihia for 2 hours. The town is seriously 6 blocks long and all along a beach. o.O While making a good effort to be quiet despite his horrendous intoxication, he sits on his bottom bunk and glugs a litre of milk. Blech. An hour later his cell alarm goes off and he doesn't even wake up. James and I throw shoes and water bottles at his head but he's pretty much dead so James had to turn it off.
We run into Daniel and Matty later in the morning and apparently Shae got totally off his ass at the dudes house and passed out in a chair. They weren't able to wake him up and had to pick up the chair and toss him out of it to get him moving. On the walk home the three of them spotted some girls in a pool and Shae stripped down to skinny dip with them... and that's the last they saw of him for the night.
The bus from Paihia to Auckland was pretty chill, everyone was partied out and we slept mostly. Arrived back at the Base hostel and going stright to the pub I ran into Adie, my dear superwoman-wearing friend from last week. Had a pint with him and another English ginger dude by the name of Jed Bolt. That's right, Jed Bolt.
|
Jed had been working on the south island at a ski lift for two years and it was his last night in NZ. He invited me out to dinner as he was keen to get down on some shellfish and we headed out to the fish market. It was seriously as if I had taken a taxi right back to Taiwan - freaky seafood in various tanks and bins: urchins, cod, clams, mussells, oysters, and crayfish, enormous fucking crayfish. These crayfish were priced at $58/ lb and the smallest one was 2lbs. So we sit down at a table and proceed to eat a crayfish sauteed with ginger and lime on noodles, oysters in the shell and clams in black bean sauce. All of this was paired with a fantastic Heather Hills Sav. Blanc we'd picked up earlier. Hands down - one of the top 10 meals I've had in my life. The next hour was filled with slurping from shells, cracking legs with our teeth and sipping. Unbelievable. Mr. Bolt was kind enough to foot the bill and we headed back to the hostel to go to the bar...
Partied with Adie and the English lads from the bus, got tons of drinks with the bartenders who lovingly call me "Anna from Canada" or "Canadianna" or "Canadanna", dance dance dance
Early early bus this morning, drove up to the top of Mount Eden in Auckland but couldn't see much of a view as it was pissing rain. Headed East and stopped at a town called Thames (named after the English river), kept driving to the hot water beach, which I was really looking forward to. How to rock the hot water beach:
1) Walk down the beach to where the signs are
2) Bury your feet in the sand until you feel heat
3) Dig a hole
4) Sit in the hole full of bejeesus hot water
I found a good setup with some local Kiwi dudes who had a tub right where the waves were coming in so it alternated hot and cold - fantastic. :-)
Went on a nature walk in the afternoon and checked out Cathedral Cove, a little beach tucked away with some cool rock formations.
Spending the night in Mercury Bay tonight at a small mom and pop backpacker hostel. Had a giant Spag Bol (Spaghetti Bolognese for us Canadians) and played pool and darts all night, how British haha. Ran into Jaekwan, a dude I met in Auckland, who told me he was on the tour earlier in the week and lost track of time while at Cathedral Cove and got left behind by the bus driver. Apparently he had to hitch hike into Mercury Bay and the dude in the car had a hand gun... :-S
Headed to Rotorua tomorrow for some hot springs. I booked an extra day there so I can have a spa day mwa ahaha Also very much looking forward to getting off the bus full of Scots and Brits and meeting a fresh batch of pals.
Friday, November 19, 2010
First Days on the Kiwi Bus
At the recommendation of several other travelers and my dear pal Patrick, I was told that the Kiwi Experience Bus was THE way for a solo backpacker to check out the sights in NZ and get around for cheap. As I've learned over the past two days, it's also very easy to get in with the drivers and get completely shitfaced with them at the pub once you arrive at your destination.
Left Auckland day before yesterday and hopped on the Auckland-Paihia bus at like 6am. Stop at various honey farms and pituresque sights along the way. Sign up sheets circulate for tons of tours, bungee jumping, sky diving, speed boating, nature walks, etc. etc.
I sign up for a dolphin swim and once we reach Paihia I go directly from the bus to the marina, do not pass Go, do not collect $200. Me and another German girl from the bus head out and air cruising around the Bay of Islands on a sick little catamaran ran by a young pilot chick named Grace and an older stewardess chick named Moppy who has a gold tooth.
Let's be clear here: Moppy is really really into dolphins. She encourages get on our tummies and stick our heads out over the bow so we can see them swim under the boat and hear all the clicks and whistles... and lovingly schreeches "Hello muffin!! Oh you cheeky muppet!" to every critter swimming past.
My two favourite things about dolphins:
1) Like humans they have sex for fun and in their society it's totally cool to be girl-on-girl, guy-on-guy, dolphin on a bit of seaweed - whatever.
2) Individual dolphins float around to different pods, flipping in and out of different groups and travelling mad distances all the way. If they don't have a baby, they just do whatever they want. :-D
After the dolphin day, me and German Jasmine check into the hostel and proceed to lounge out in the hot tub. Now don't be too jealous here, this hot tub is only big enough to cram in about 5 small German chicks or 3 English dudes, depending how you look at it. We then enjoy the $10 bbq at the hostel where we eat enourmous yummy steaks, sausages, coleslaw, baked potatoes... pretty much more calories than I've consumed over the past 2 days. nom nom nom
Get on the piss with everyone, including a Welsh dude who looks eerily similar to Freddie Mercury. I met the owner of the hostel, Bobbi, back at the bar in Auckland and she hooked me up with mad drinks. Her and the bar chick need to do a Famil. on one of the local sailing trips (get to know the tour so they can recommend it) and they invite me to come along on Sunday - sweet!!
Spent yesterday doing the Cape Reinga tour - a cruise up to the very top tip of NZ with a rad Maouri driver. Pissing rain in the morning but it makes for a pituresque tromp through the forest to check out the massive local trees they make the dugout canoes from. Cruise up to the Cape to see the Tasman Sea and the Pacific Ocean crashing into each other, it's sunny by then and you could totally see the two different colours of water mixing. Head to another gorgeous beach for lunch and a frolick in the waves. I see a couple dead blue bottles washed up in the surf.... :-S
After lunch we head to the dunes to go Sandboarding. Those from Black Creek will appreciate this sport which is similar to Dirtboarding, only these dunes are fucking MASSIVE and you go down face first REAL FAST. Many fellow boarders come away with sandburn from spectacular wipeouts.
Rip through a creek and down to 90 mile beach in the bus, see Seals chilling out, dead sharks washed up on shore, dudes fishing. Get out and dig for clams called Piu Pius, get a whole fucking bucket within like 5 minutes, unbelieveable. The guide busts a couple open to eat raw, me and a Japanese chick were the only ones who got down on it though. Have a nice winding cruise back down the point, stop for fish and chips and eat my weight in marinated mussells.
Back to the hostel, back to the hot tub, back to the pub where it's like glow stick night or some shit and they're painting everyone in tribal designs with neon black light paint. A couple of the bartenders from Auckland roll in and things get properly out of hand. :-)
Chilling out today, probably going sailing with the chicks tomorrow, then driving out to Auckland to crash there for a night before heading out to Mercury Bay where you can dig holes in the sand and make your own little geothermal bathtub. It's a hard life...
Left Auckland day before yesterday and hopped on the Auckland-Paihia bus at like 6am. Stop at various honey farms and pituresque sights along the way. Sign up sheets circulate for tons of tours, bungee jumping, sky diving, speed boating, nature walks, etc. etc.
I sign up for a dolphin swim and once we reach Paihia I go directly from the bus to the marina, do not pass Go, do not collect $200. Me and another German girl from the bus head out and air cruising around the Bay of Islands on a sick little catamaran ran by a young pilot chick named Grace and an older stewardess chick named Moppy who has a gold tooth.
Let's be clear here: Moppy is really really into dolphins. She encourages get on our tummies and stick our heads out over the bow so we can see them swim under the boat and hear all the clicks and whistles... and lovingly schreeches "Hello muffin!! Oh you cheeky muppet!" to every critter swimming past.
My two favourite things about dolphins:
1) Like humans they have sex for fun and in their society it's totally cool to be girl-on-girl, guy-on-guy, dolphin on a bit of seaweed - whatever.
2) Individual dolphins float around to different pods, flipping in and out of different groups and travelling mad distances all the way. If they don't have a baby, they just do whatever they want. :-D
After the dolphin day, me and German Jasmine check into the hostel and proceed to lounge out in the hot tub. Now don't be too jealous here, this hot tub is only big enough to cram in about 5 small German chicks or 3 English dudes, depending how you look at it. We then enjoy the $10 bbq at the hostel where we eat enourmous yummy steaks, sausages, coleslaw, baked potatoes... pretty much more calories than I've consumed over the past 2 days. nom nom nom
Get on the piss with everyone, including a Welsh dude who looks eerily similar to Freddie Mercury. I met the owner of the hostel, Bobbi, back at the bar in Auckland and she hooked me up with mad drinks. Her and the bar chick need to do a Famil. on one of the local sailing trips (get to know the tour so they can recommend it) and they invite me to come along on Sunday - sweet!!
Spent yesterday doing the Cape Reinga tour - a cruise up to the very top tip of NZ with a rad Maouri driver. Pissing rain in the morning but it makes for a pituresque tromp through the forest to check out the massive local trees they make the dugout canoes from. Cruise up to the Cape to see the Tasman Sea and the Pacific Ocean crashing into each other, it's sunny by then and you could totally see the two different colours of water mixing. Head to another gorgeous beach for lunch and a frolick in the waves. I see a couple dead blue bottles washed up in the surf.... :-S
After lunch we head to the dunes to go Sandboarding. Those from Black Creek will appreciate this sport which is similar to Dirtboarding, only these dunes are fucking MASSIVE and you go down face first REAL FAST. Many fellow boarders come away with sandburn from spectacular wipeouts.
Rip through a creek and down to 90 mile beach in the bus, see Seals chilling out, dead sharks washed up on shore, dudes fishing. Get out and dig for clams called Piu Pius, get a whole fucking bucket within like 5 minutes, unbelieveable. The guide busts a couple open to eat raw, me and a Japanese chick were the only ones who got down on it though. Have a nice winding cruise back down the point, stop for fish and chips and eat my weight in marinated mussells.
Back to the hostel, back to the hot tub, back to the pub where it's like glow stick night or some shit and they're painting everyone in tribal designs with neon black light paint. A couple of the bartenders from Auckland roll in and things get properly out of hand. :-)
Chilling out today, probably going sailing with the chicks tomorrow, then driving out to Auckland to crash there for a night before heading out to Mercury Bay where you can dig holes in the sand and make your own little geothermal bathtub. It's a hard life...
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
From Auckland with Love
Heading out to Paihia tomorrow after a lovely week in Auckland.
Here's what I've been up to during the day:
- Walked around looking for a post office and got lost, but saw an amazing public art exhibit and talked to many interesting strangers
- Visited the zoo and saw an elephant in the flesh for the first time ever
- Had a nap at Western Springs park, similar to Beacon Hill but way more freaky birds
- Went to Waiheke Island with a couple other Canadian girls, hung out at Onetangi beach and partied with the locals. Please note locals = 30 dudes who like to share their beer.
- Took a free Auckland day trip, made friends with a dude who looked like a 23 year-old Jude Law, walked over the Harbour bridge in a dorky harness and helmet and watched bungee jumpers, ate fish and chips where the slab of Hoki was the size of my torso, cruised around Devonport
- Refined my tennis skills on the Wii at the hostel pub. Hey! All those lessons DID come in handy!!
And here are a few things I've done in Auckland at night:
- Got in the with bar managers here at the hostel and drank my weight in Jack Daniels and Vodka Lemonade
- Got in the with bar managers at hostels in Australia and other spots in NZ and look forward to their free drinks
- Received a terrifying kiss from a 50-something Australian hostel bar manager sporting the scariest handle-bar mustache ever, and pretty sure that bad boy isn't just on for Movember
- Waxed an Australian drag queen's nipples so he/she could get a free drink
- Won quiz night by two bonus points, victory achieved due to a porno cartoon I drew of Tony the Tiger getting down with his missus.
- Made friends with Mauri bartenders, British lesbians, Japanese break dancers, Irish skanks, American card sharks, Scottish pool sharks, a smattering of German, Dutch and Danish teenagers and a team of Welsh dudes who like to pull down their short shorts and run around the bar with their asses out. Oh and a lovely dude named Adie with a broken arm who likes to get pirate drunk and run around in a superwoman costume while clutching a sock monkey.
- Enjoyed a burger bigger than my head with beetroot on it at BurgerFuel, yummy goat kebabs and tidal wave after tidal wave of Export Gold lager
- Danced, danced, danced!!
Thanks Auckland, it's been a blast!!!
Here's what I've been up to during the day:
- Walked around looking for a post office and got lost, but saw an amazing public art exhibit and talked to many interesting strangers
- Visited the zoo and saw an elephant in the flesh for the first time ever
- Had a nap at Western Springs park, similar to Beacon Hill but way more freaky birds
- Went to Waiheke Island with a couple other Canadian girls, hung out at Onetangi beach and partied with the locals. Please note locals = 30 dudes who like to share their beer.
- Took a free Auckland day trip, made friends with a dude who looked like a 23 year-old Jude Law, walked over the Harbour bridge in a dorky harness and helmet and watched bungee jumpers, ate fish and chips where the slab of Hoki was the size of my torso, cruised around Devonport
- Refined my tennis skills on the Wii at the hostel pub. Hey! All those lessons DID come in handy!!
And here are a few things I've done in Auckland at night:
- Got in the with bar managers here at the hostel and drank my weight in Jack Daniels and Vodka Lemonade
- Got in the with bar managers at hostels in Australia and other spots in NZ and look forward to their free drinks
- Received a terrifying kiss from a 50-something Australian hostel bar manager sporting the scariest handle-bar mustache ever, and pretty sure that bad boy isn't just on for Movember
- Waxed an Australian drag queen's nipples so he/she could get a free drink
- Won quiz night by two bonus points, victory achieved due to a porno cartoon I drew of Tony the Tiger getting down with his missus.
- Made friends with Mauri bartenders, British lesbians, Japanese break dancers, Irish skanks, American card sharks, Scottish pool sharks, a smattering of German, Dutch and Danish teenagers and a team of Welsh dudes who like to pull down their short shorts and run around the bar with their asses out. Oh and a lovely dude named Adie with a broken arm who likes to get pirate drunk and run around in a superwoman costume while clutching a sock monkey.
- Enjoyed a burger bigger than my head with beetroot on it at BurgerFuel, yummy goat kebabs and tidal wave after tidal wave of Export Gold lager
- Danced, danced, danced!!
Thanks Auckland, it's been a blast!!!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Welcome to New Zealand
This morning I woke up in New Zealand for the first time to the sound of crinkling plastic. One of the girls in the dorm room is packing up her shit... what the fuck? I'm in a dorm? I open my eyes and I'm on the top bunk wearing my bar star clothes. Faaaaak.
My flight from Hong Kong to Auckland was hands down the best flight of my entire life. Not crowded, full of polite people, and my two favourite words in the world: free beer. Friendly attractive stewardesses cruise the aisles with bottles of NZ wine in both hands. Also there wasn't a single baby on the flight - yesss!
Cruise through customs without a problem, hop on a shuttle and find the first people I meet in NZ are an old couple from Victoria. Land at the hostel (Auckland Base) and immediately go on a walk to check out the city. Staring out at the green waters as I was walking along the harbour by the ferry terminals I had a sharp moment of "What the fuck do I do now??" Well, I'd best do what I do best - I headed back to the hostel for a beer in the lounge.
Ended up meeting a bunch of British dudes who are tight with the bar owner, played beer pong with some Germans, met another dude from BC who just arrived as well, headed down to another bar in the hostel for free pizza and ended up getting hella drunk and dancing my head off all night with some hot chicks from Ireland.
I have a week booked here in Auckland so I'll do some Island hopping and touring around but I think I'll get out of the city ASAP, head down to Raglan as planned and then make it down to Wellington to party with the fantastic Alieda and John!!
My flight from Hong Kong to Auckland was hands down the best flight of my entire life. Not crowded, full of polite people, and my two favourite words in the world: free beer. Friendly attractive stewardesses cruise the aisles with bottles of NZ wine in both hands. Also there wasn't a single baby on the flight - yesss!
Cruise through customs without a problem, hop on a shuttle and find the first people I meet in NZ are an old couple from Victoria. Land at the hostel (Auckland Base) and immediately go on a walk to check out the city. Staring out at the green waters as I was walking along the harbour by the ferry terminals I had a sharp moment of "What the fuck do I do now??" Well, I'd best do what I do best - I headed back to the hostel for a beer in the lounge.
Ended up meeting a bunch of British dudes who are tight with the bar owner, played beer pong with some Germans, met another dude from BC who just arrived as well, headed down to another bar in the hostel for free pizza and ended up getting hella drunk and dancing my head off all night with some hot chicks from Ireland.
I have a week booked here in Auckland so I'll do some Island hopping and touring around but I think I'll get out of the city ASAP, head down to Raglan as planned and then make it down to Wellington to party with the fantastic Alieda and John!!
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Take Off
Just said my last goodbye, walked Dad to his gate for his flight home to Vancouver. He had some tears which was pretty hard on the heart strings but between sniffs said he was so proud of me. Trembling with emotion, I immediately headed to a smoking room to enjoy a smoke with 20 Chinese dudes. Once I composed myself I looked up at the tv and saw an interview with Federer the tennis pro on ESPN and laughed.
Eight months ago I was taking tennis lessons with my ex and our instructor always compared his style to Federer. Funny to think that not that long ago I was living a boring kept life where the most exciting thing I had to look forward to was Tuesday night tennis lessons, our last ditch effort at 'Play Together Stay Together' to save our crap relationship.
Now here I am, in the Hong Kong airport, waiting for my flight to New Zealand, watching my Dad's plane take off in the complete opposite direction of where I'm headed.
Earlier today I had my brother translate a bookmark I found at the bookstore with my name in Mandarin. It was a totally random occurence - someone sold a book to the store and it had this bookmark in it and the translation on the back said "On Sexy Lady." Jesse laughed and said that it actually means "Peaceful Lady" which I kind of like better. :-)
Eight months ago I was taking tennis lessons with my ex and our instructor always compared his style to Federer. Funny to think that not that long ago I was living a boring kept life where the most exciting thing I had to look forward to was Tuesday night tennis lessons, our last ditch effort at 'Play Together Stay Together' to save our crap relationship.
Now here I am, in the Hong Kong airport, waiting for my flight to New Zealand, watching my Dad's plane take off in the complete opposite direction of where I'm headed.
Earlier today I had my brother translate a bookmark I found at the bookstore with my name in Mandarin. It was a totally random occurence - someone sold a book to the store and it had this bookmark in it and the translation on the back said "On Sexy Lady." Jesse laughed and said that it actually means "Peaceful Lady" which I kind of like better. :-)
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Top 10 Things I Liked About Jesse's Wedding
1) It was at a Disney-themed one-stop shop - hair salon, make up artist, parking, restaurant, swimming pool, bars, dance floors, dining patios, waterfalls, fireworks, Cinderella-esque carriage, Seven Dwarves nestled among the trees... possibly the most magical place on earth to have a wedding.
2) Make up artist uses Dior products, and because she doesn't speak any English, she has complete creative license over your face. For me this was a good thing - purple smokey eye and juicy tube gloss. For my 60 year old mom this meant hair and lash extensions which made her look like Miss Texas 1975.
3) The make up artist also helps you into your dress. Why would I need help getting into a dress you ask? Because it includes getting into a lovely invention called an Un-bra. She tells me to bend over (doesn't even buy me dinner first!!), adheres these 2-inch thick silicone things to my nei neis and clips them together to create cleavage. She then gets out a roll of DUCT TAPE and proceeds to tape around my torso until my A cups are touching my chin.
4) You are not only allowed to drink and smoke while getting your hair done for the wedding, it's encouraged. Picture me and 6 Taiwanese chicks sipping Taiwan Beers through a straw and smoking Marlboro Golds while being doused with hairspray and Evian facial mist.
5) 13 course dinner. That's right,13. Not only did I eat shark fin soup, I enjoyed abalone (illegal in Canada) and at least a dozen other critters in various forms and flavours. Thankfully in Taiwan it's actually rude to finish your food because it means that your host hasn't provided enough for you so I didn't need to bullime or anything.
6) Fun and games, such as writing wishes to the bride and groom and dropping them in a jar. Later on, the Bride gets on the mic and "randomly" draws out three to read aloud and give a prize. At this wedding, the prizes were teddy bears dressed like brides that danced to 'Love Potion Number Nine'
7) Bridesmaids and Groomsmen are given important responsibilities. Annie, the other bridesmaid, was in charge of the rings. Top Secret: Ruby's ring got dropped somewhere around the Seven Dwarfs and a magic tree on the way to the alter and we had to get an assistant who looked like an Asian Ringo Star to find it. Gavin, a groomsman, was in charge of Jesse's dogs all night. Not such a problem at an outdoor venue, except when you consider that they're both rescued street dogs surrounded by food and small children. It was my responsibility to walk down the aisle arm in arm with Gavin while holding one of these dogs and wearing a huge dress and five inch heels. In the rain. On a bridge over a pool. With 200 people taking photos. Later on I was also in charge of handing out balloons. :-D
8) If you like Maury Povich you would love this wedding. A hostess on a mic introduces you (in Mandarin and English) as you walk down the aisle and everyone cheers. Then the bride and groom come down and everyone goes crazy. Then they say "I do" and everyone cheers. Then they both say a speech to each other's parents and everyone does the "aaaaw" and cheers.
9) The bride wears three outfits: wedding dress, cutting the cake dress and farewell thanks for coming dress. At first I thought this was ludicrous but now realize it's brilliant. While everyone is mowing down their 13 courses, the bride gets to hang out in the make up chair drinking, smoking and eating sushi completely avoiding the stressful shit show that is your own wedding. Then she comes out and cuts some cake, then runs away to hide again. This also allows the groom to get completely batshit drunk which leads me to my final and favourite part...
10) Drinking. So. Much. Drinking. Dad, Mom, Jesse, Ruby, Ruby's parents walk around to each table thanking them for coming and have a toast... and everyone drinks juice except for Jesse who slams a glass of red wine for each table. Taiwanese folks are really into cheers and introductions so someone will want to try out their English and introduce you to someone and you say cheers. Times 200 people. This means that more than half the people at the wedding become "That Guy" and "That Girl", a role normally reserved for only a few people at a typical Canadian wedding. By the end of the night my brother couldn't stand and I was surrounded by sweaty disgusting white business men and plastered Asian hotties posing for lewd pictures in the Disney Kingdom - it was like the most horrific and fun wedding-themed trip ever.
2) Make up artist uses Dior products, and because she doesn't speak any English, she has complete creative license over your face. For me this was a good thing - purple smokey eye and juicy tube gloss. For my 60 year old mom this meant hair and lash extensions which made her look like Miss Texas 1975.
3) The make up artist also helps you into your dress. Why would I need help getting into a dress you ask? Because it includes getting into a lovely invention called an Un-bra. She tells me to bend over (doesn't even buy me dinner first!!), adheres these 2-inch thick silicone things to my nei neis and clips them together to create cleavage. She then gets out a roll of DUCT TAPE and proceeds to tape around my torso until my A cups are touching my chin.
4) You are not only allowed to drink and smoke while getting your hair done for the wedding, it's encouraged. Picture me and 6 Taiwanese chicks sipping Taiwan Beers through a straw and smoking Marlboro Golds while being doused with hairspray and Evian facial mist.
5) 13 course dinner. That's right,13. Not only did I eat shark fin soup, I enjoyed abalone (illegal in Canada) and at least a dozen other critters in various forms and flavours. Thankfully in Taiwan it's actually rude to finish your food because it means that your host hasn't provided enough for you so I didn't need to bullime or anything.
6) Fun and games, such as writing wishes to the bride and groom and dropping them in a jar. Later on, the Bride gets on the mic and "randomly" draws out three to read aloud and give a prize. At this wedding, the prizes were teddy bears dressed like brides that danced to 'Love Potion Number Nine'
7) Bridesmaids and Groomsmen are given important responsibilities. Annie, the other bridesmaid, was in charge of the rings. Top Secret: Ruby's ring got dropped somewhere around the Seven Dwarfs and a magic tree on the way to the alter and we had to get an assistant who looked like an Asian Ringo Star to find it. Gavin, a groomsman, was in charge of Jesse's dogs all night. Not such a problem at an outdoor venue, except when you consider that they're both rescued street dogs surrounded by food and small children. It was my responsibility to walk down the aisle arm in arm with Gavin while holding one of these dogs and wearing a huge dress and five inch heels. In the rain. On a bridge over a pool. With 200 people taking photos. Later on I was also in charge of handing out balloons. :-D
8) If you like Maury Povich you would love this wedding. A hostess on a mic introduces you (in Mandarin and English) as you walk down the aisle and everyone cheers. Then the bride and groom come down and everyone goes crazy. Then they say "I do" and everyone cheers. Then they both say a speech to each other's parents and everyone does the "aaaaw" and cheers.
9) The bride wears three outfits: wedding dress, cutting the cake dress and farewell thanks for coming dress. At first I thought this was ludicrous but now realize it's brilliant. While everyone is mowing down their 13 courses, the bride gets to hang out in the make up chair drinking, smoking and eating sushi completely avoiding the stressful shit show that is your own wedding. Then she comes out and cuts some cake, then runs away to hide again. This also allows the groom to get completely batshit drunk which leads me to my final and favourite part...
10) Drinking. So. Much. Drinking. Dad, Mom, Jesse, Ruby, Ruby's parents walk around to each table thanking them for coming and have a toast... and everyone drinks juice except for Jesse who slams a glass of red wine for each table. Taiwanese folks are really into cheers and introductions so someone will want to try out their English and introduce you to someone and you say cheers. Times 200 people. This means that more than half the people at the wedding become "That Guy" and "That Girl", a role normally reserved for only a few people at a typical Canadian wedding. By the end of the night my brother couldn't stand and I was surrounded by sweaty disgusting white business men and plastered Asian hotties posing for lewd pictures in the Disney Kingdom - it was like the most horrific and fun wedding-themed trip ever.
Saturday, November 6, 2010
From November 4th
It's the middle of the night... I've been to lazy to select the time on this computer, or select a network on my cell, or set the time correctly on the small clock in my room so I don't really know what time it is. Also, it's so polluted here that the sunrise doesn't really happen the same way. Either way, it's night time and I'm in that weird jet lag state where earlier I was so tired I was almost dead and now I'm awake like a squirrell on meth.
Flights from Vancouver to Taipei were fairly uneventful and turbulence free. The Vancouver - Hong Kong hop was a 13.5 hr flight, with screaming Chinese babies in front and behind my Dad and I. I caught maybe 3 hrs sleep. Almost missed the second flight from Hong Kong to Taipei as the connection was so close but so far I've been totally stoked with Cathay Pacific, mostly because the food is so yummy. Last time I flew over to Taiwan I'd just read an article that people are most likely to contract colds when they eat, so I decided to fast for the 30 hours of travel. True, I didn't get a cold and my Dad did, but I had such low blood sugar I was a grumpy like the wrath of God which, in hindsight, may have strained things with my travel partner a bit.
Dad and I are traveling with his younger brother Harley and his wife Joan. Harley looks and acts exactly like my Dad only he has a red beard, and Joan looks and acts exactly like my mom except she's blonde. It's funny because of all the family Jesse will have representing him at this wedding, the men (step dad Jack, Dad and Harley) are all tall, fat bearded roughnecks wearing socks and sandals and the women (Joan and my mom) are weathered looking broads with torsos like kegs. And then there's me haha.
When my brother Jesse, the groom, picked us up at the airport, there were hundreds of screaming Asian girls with signs and balloons. He assured us this Chinese Beatle-mania wasn't for us, apparently the Korean equivalent to the Backstreet Boys was flying first class on our flight.
As we were driving into Taipei, the cultural, economic and political capital of Taiwan, Jesse told us about the recent typhoons. Taipei itself didn't get hit too hard but he said earlier in the season a tour bus holding several hundred Chinese tourists was driving around the sketchy mountain roads of the Northeast coast and got taken out by a massive landslide/ tidal wave. The bus and all the people in it just got swept right out to sea. Apparently we won't be visiting that part of Taiwan.
Jesse's bride Ruby was a model and is now a very successful real estate agent and has our family staying in these ultra sheik condos in the heart of Taipei. Joan, Harley and Dad are staying in a 2 bedroom suite on the 14th floor and I'm on the 12th floor with mom and Jack. After a few days of roughing it on the boat with no functional running water or fridge this suite has rocket-launched me into the luxe life of high thread count sheets and towells, remote controlled air conditioning and giant plasma tvs.
As soon as we arrived at the condos Dad was itching to go to 7eleven to score some beers so we did a bit of a walking tour around. Taiwan Golden Beers (aka TBs) are like tallees of Heineken for a buck each. Nom nom nom nom. We chill in the room for a bit, freshen up and then head our for dinner. The condos are conveniently located above a 4 story mall with an entire floor called Gourmet Avenue - sushi, sezhuan, hot pot, pizza, western food, seafood, starbucks, you name it.
After dinner Jesse went to pick up mom and Jack from the airport and ten offered to take me out to his place to walk his dogs. Let's be blunt here: Jesse's neighbourhood is fucking terrifying. Packs of wild dogs running around dark smelly alleys, wires hanging everywhere, filthy buildings and groups of working dudes sitting standing around smoking and spitting. When we walk into his apartment though, a ground floor suite in a small complex, it looks like the kind of place I'd expect a securities broker and a real estate agent/ former model to live - white furniture everywhere, clean, stuffed animals and Alan Greenspan books lining the shelves.
We take the dogs out and run into a street dog who Jesse tells me got one of his dogs pregnant earlier in the year. Both his dogs are Taiwanese Toko dogs, like little mini black lab malamutes with chupacabra heads. One is named Bear (She Shiang) because she looked like a bear when she was a baby, the other is named Lucky (Lei Hok) because he rescued her off the street... and Jesse also loves Lucky lager. :-P
I see the sun coming up so I better crash out. I have a dress fitting with the bride tomorrow for my bridesmaid's dress. Kristy, I'm sure you're feeling my excitement for that all the way across the globe haha.
Flights from Vancouver to Taipei were fairly uneventful and turbulence free. The Vancouver - Hong Kong hop was a 13.5 hr flight, with screaming Chinese babies in front and behind my Dad and I. I caught maybe 3 hrs sleep. Almost missed the second flight from Hong Kong to Taipei as the connection was so close but so far I've been totally stoked with Cathay Pacific, mostly because the food is so yummy. Last time I flew over to Taiwan I'd just read an article that people are most likely to contract colds when they eat, so I decided to fast for the 30 hours of travel. True, I didn't get a cold and my Dad did, but I had such low blood sugar I was a grumpy like the wrath of God which, in hindsight, may have strained things with my travel partner a bit.
Dad and I are traveling with his younger brother Harley and his wife Joan. Harley looks and acts exactly like my Dad only he has a red beard, and Joan looks and acts exactly like my mom except she's blonde. It's funny because of all the family Jesse will have representing him at this wedding, the men (step dad Jack, Dad and Harley) are all tall, fat bearded roughnecks wearing socks and sandals and the women (Joan and my mom) are weathered looking broads with torsos like kegs. And then there's me haha.
When my brother Jesse, the groom, picked us up at the airport, there were hundreds of screaming Asian girls with signs and balloons. He assured us this Chinese Beatle-mania wasn't for us, apparently the Korean equivalent to the Backstreet Boys was flying first class on our flight.
As we were driving into Taipei, the cultural, economic and political capital of Taiwan, Jesse told us about the recent typhoons. Taipei itself didn't get hit too hard but he said earlier in the season a tour bus holding several hundred Chinese tourists was driving around the sketchy mountain roads of the Northeast coast and got taken out by a massive landslide/ tidal wave. The bus and all the people in it just got swept right out to sea. Apparently we won't be visiting that part of Taiwan.
Jesse's bride Ruby was a model and is now a very successful real estate agent and has our family staying in these ultra sheik condos in the heart of Taipei. Joan, Harley and Dad are staying in a 2 bedroom suite on the 14th floor and I'm on the 12th floor with mom and Jack. After a few days of roughing it on the boat with no functional running water or fridge this suite has rocket-launched me into the luxe life of high thread count sheets and towells, remote controlled air conditioning and giant plasma tvs.
As soon as we arrived at the condos Dad was itching to go to 7eleven to score some beers so we did a bit of a walking tour around. Taiwan Golden Beers (aka TBs) are like tallees of Heineken for a buck each. Nom nom nom nom. We chill in the room for a bit, freshen up and then head our for dinner. The condos are conveniently located above a 4 story mall with an entire floor called Gourmet Avenue - sushi, sezhuan, hot pot, pizza, western food, seafood, starbucks, you name it.
After dinner Jesse went to pick up mom and Jack from the airport and ten offered to take me out to his place to walk his dogs. Let's be blunt here: Jesse's neighbourhood is fucking terrifying. Packs of wild dogs running around dark smelly alleys, wires hanging everywhere, filthy buildings and groups of working dudes sitting standing around smoking and spitting. When we walk into his apartment though, a ground floor suite in a small complex, it looks like the kind of place I'd expect a securities broker and a real estate agent/ former model to live - white furniture everywhere, clean, stuffed animals and Alan Greenspan books lining the shelves.
We take the dogs out and run into a street dog who Jesse tells me got one of his dogs pregnant earlier in the year. Both his dogs are Taiwanese Toko dogs, like little mini black lab malamutes with chupacabra heads. One is named Bear (She Shiang) because she looked like a bear when she was a baby, the other is named Lucky (Lei Hok) because he rescued her off the street... and Jesse also loves Lucky lager. :-P
I see the sun coming up so I better crash out. I have a dress fitting with the bride tomorrow for my bridesmaid's dress. Kristy, I'm sure you're feeling my excitement for that all the way across the globe haha.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Here we go!!!
Sitting in the Vancouver airport with my Dad, Uncle Harley and Auntie Joan from Prince Rupert waiting to board our flight at 2:45... and it's 12:30. :-/ Happy to have a few hours to read and relax after the past few days or partying and living/ camping on the boat. Let's hope there aren't any drug tests in Taiwan!!
Halloween was the shitshow I had hoped it would be and after a few nights on the boat aka Hotel Nauti Buoye I'm feeling pretty zen.
Pretty weird leaving Victoria today on the ferry but I think the weirdest part was how totally calm I was. Leaving Russell Books, saying all my goodbyes and moving out of the James Bay chick pad and leaving all my worldly goods in a U Haul Storage Locker all clicked along without a problem. Also, I've been on a bender for about 10 days now so I think I'm probably pretty disconnected from reality at this point haha.
Apparently we're arriving in Hong Kong at 10:30am local time and then fly to Taipei where brother Jesse the groom will be waiting with a giant van to take us to our apartments. 13 hour flight from Vancouver to Hong Kong and then 1.5 hrs from Hong Kong to Taipei... glad I had those 2 beers a few hours ago. :-D
Halloween was the shitshow I had hoped it would be and after a few nights on the boat aka Hotel Nauti Buoye I'm feeling pretty zen.
Pretty weird leaving Victoria today on the ferry but I think the weirdest part was how totally calm I was. Leaving Russell Books, saying all my goodbyes and moving out of the James Bay chick pad and leaving all my worldly goods in a U Haul Storage Locker all clicked along without a problem. Also, I've been on a bender for about 10 days now so I think I'm probably pretty disconnected from reality at this point haha.
Apparently we're arriving in Hong Kong at 10:30am local time and then fly to Taipei where brother Jesse the groom will be waiting with a giant van to take us to our apartments. 13 hour flight from Vancouver to Hong Kong and then 1.5 hrs from Hong Kong to Taipei... glad I had those 2 beers a few hours ago. :-D
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